At Easter, he tried to stay home and reflect or simply wander in the comfort that I offered my bed and my bedroom, of course, in addition to Internet and cable as that vagrancy becomes something pleasant but especially seductive, at least for me, that's for leisure or me so I take more seriously than my periods of work.
But back to the point, at Easter here in Lima - Peru I can not have that luxury because this is a holiday, in USA are ordinary days. That belong to the Catholic world in our country has paid in religious days of "healthy entertainment." However, and as the story aside, I must say that besides me lonely and relaxed whenever I'm in Lima seek refuge in God and go to church early Sunday and took part in the rituals to the extent that I feel good myself in it.
As part of the celebrations of Holy Week, on Monday was the mass of free pardon, and as I said, put bags for people to deposit their paper with individual or pecadotes little sins, and which are dumped and burned and the culmination of that action taken for forgiven and your soul be clean again until 5 minutes a reckless pedestrian crossing and he minds the mother, or your wife will ask for money for household expenses and I reproached him out of church you are with honey, or other things that made you leave the fold again and be the black sheep who will seek always the path of return to the beloved pastor.
The other situation and also part of the mass of forgiveness that day is that there are plenty of priests in the confessional who both confessed to hundreds of parishioners negligence (like me) who can not see well deserved and you write your little sins ... We are convinced that we deserve a good penance for sivergüenzuras committed and the damage to others caused by madness, debauchery own momentum or the abandonment not only of the spiritual life because it really goes beyond that, is, I think, the abandonment of self, not wanting him for refusing to be tempted or temptations. It is very easy to say "the flesh is weak" and most will assume that forgiveness because God is love or because nobody ever saw me or find me.
The truth is that one can escape from everyone but yourself and, of course, God, if we assume that he is everywhere and sees everything. One can not escape the guilt, anguish, knowing he has betrayed or have damaged something good or someone good at his outburst excessive and without meditation. Nothing justifies, you end up analyzing deeply, nothing justifies the betrayal not only to another but himself, yes, because that ended up doing betraying ourselves to our beliefs, our values, what we want and what really matters in our lives .
ended up convinced that he must face myself in front of a cure and I did, after almost 5 years without confession, I waited, I spoke, I took toooooooooooooooooodo what still overwhelmed me, not because he lived the "sin" yet, but because despite all the ugly I know I did go through a time of my life that I thought deserved and lived each day with joy and some cloudy fault that I wanted to delete and now I got clear. I faced myself and now I feel better with God and with myself and I think that's the best thing that ever happened before.
thank God for His infinite goodness and such wonderful ways to let me know who is with me every day.
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